Hi guys, it’s been a while, I’m so sorry for drifting off… here’s a submission from my very good friend and brother, Enjoy.
Jennifer, -Jenny baby- as she likes to be Jennifer, -Jenny baby- as she likes to be referred to in the company of her friends due to her almost atomic resemblance to the Nollywood superstar Genevieve Nnaji is a pretty young lady who stays in the suburbs of Lagos, quite the charmer she is, also the ticket to free rides and most often times free meal whenever they visit the restaurant with her “girl on fire” flair and her cat like greyish eyes.
Her British accent would often times get her in trouble with female lecturers who deem her fake but was the centre of attention with the male lecturers she solely regards to as Agbaya of the school. Extremely corny she was as she escaped their advances and resultant wrath with relative ease and creativity. Always thinking of ways to come up with new lines and escape phrases, she was quite an escape artiste of her own. Reverse was the case here for her as she sat uncomfortably and uncontrollably restless in the bus feverently trying to call a number on her phone. Murmuring “pick up Tunde! pick up, Please pick up!” with the seriousness and relentless attitude of an aboki trying to sell bush meat on the express during the ebola outbreak.
“Next bus stop” she said as she sat in a weirdly scanty molue, it was just after office resumption hours and the third mainland bridge remained free of traffic. Again, “O wa o” was what came out of her mouth, her face lightened up (Tunde had taken her call) as she stretched 1000 naira to the conductor, alighted and walked away in delight quite oblivious she just broke the Guinness book of record being the first Nigerian to forget nine hundred Naira change.
“Tunde, Good gracious!, I must have called you for about 50 times or more. Have you picked up the suit and my gown from the dry cleaner?, Meet me at my place before 7pm. I’m on my way home from the bodyshop. Bye” she walked away with the swagger of a runway model still oblivious to the world record she broke like 105seconds ago.
Jennifer rushed to the door, water splattering and her sexy leg moving lankily all over the tiled floor all the way from the bath tub to let Tunde in. She had promised him she would explain what she needed him for immediately he got over and she made good on her promise by getting right down to it before he could get down with the “Was’sup” he had on his tongue.
“Okay Tunde I need you as a double to my date tonight… It’s an open bar of 5 star drinks”
Tunde was going to say no but the last part of the sentence was too good to turn down. “What’s the catch?” was all he could muster. Jenny baby had gone extreme length to get invited to the fundraiser using her dad’s connections so as to make herself noticeable to her long standing crush. She felt she stood a chance but she brought in reinforcements from body shop for her face, the gown and her favourite red bottom heels to complement the face. She only needed Tunde to get through as it was a double up invite party.
After several advances all night from a distance, it was time for her crush, the CEO of Globules Entertainment popularly called Uncle Larry to make his move at the hottest girl in d ball room. He reached into his breast pocket, pulled out a pen and made some sort of inscription on his contact card after which he strolled with utter class towards her, Jenny could swear she had frozen to a standstill as she was moments away from masterminding the biggest plan of her life. Almost in slo-mo he walked towards her as he stretched his contact card to Tunde right behind her who was getting wasted at the bar saying “here’s my number, call me maybe” and strolled off yet majestically.
Submitted by Olajide Ajayi. @Jidoolegend
Guys, please comment on the flaws and high points of the post, he’s a budding writer. Thanks.